The One True King
by ilovebotdf111
Summary: A collaboration I did with some pals (69BLOODONTHEDANCEFLOOR69 and iluvbbcm8). It tells the harrowing tale of love, loss, and redemption.


I like the part where Phineas is indeed Filch. Me? No thanks, I've gone straight; cold turkey; libido boost in three days? Count me! In, I have low T (low testosterone), so I experience low sex drive, low energy, and suppleness of the nipples. sometimes when im alone at home i masturbate into a mason jar. last night, i entered my nephew i didnt mean to it was kind of an accidental situation but all in all i enjoyed the secks and i think he did 2  
he came twice  
i came twice  
My niece asked me the other day, "Where does a fish go when you flush it?"  
I looked her in the eye, not knowing how to respond. Finally, I replied, "Burn in hell you harlot skank" and then I promptly married her until we were wed. in the hotel on our wedding she asked me what happened to her brother, i replied with "COLON" she gave me the good old puppy eyes that only a 6 year old niece can give you and said "I LOVE YOU OMG" its a good thing i live in the south because this is not frowned. if youre interested in marrying your 6 year niece your trip begins at . Once I went to visit my grandparents. they are 5 years older than my uncle rodger. My uncle Roger is a strange man. He once took me into his room alone when I was seven and showed me how to have a good time. He let me play with his joystick but I was never good at Atari. I accidentally sat down right on his joystick and broke it when suddenly an Indian guru burst into the room like a cop show and he was sporting a mosin nugget and then started aggressively playing the mandolin. Or was it the sitar? Not sure, but I'm sure it's not important since he shot my uncle while screaming the lyrics to Anger Phone by Granny Leggings. or was he screaming that my uncle was a peanut. I think he was speaking hindi so I'm not quite sure. That reminds me of the time that I went to No-Semite national park with my dad. My dad was always known for being a peanut-sized wanker!  
Ain't it fun when you  
get so high that ya  
just can't seem to cum?  
yeah ain't it fun  
when you know  
that you're gonna die young?  
It's such fun1!

Such a disgrace my aunt. I kiss her once, shame on kiss her once, shame on kiss her once, shame on me. But I kiss her twice, thrice? That's gay!  
I bought my Alien Ware PC from my best friend's tyte a$$hose. I remember I barely handed over the check when his fuckin  
Dog started eating her asshole for the poop. Inside was, I can only imagine, Ihoop? Yes please! im fuckin a dog! right now! yesterday i fucked a baby seal! the day before that? THE SAME FUCKING SEAL! MAN I LOVE THAT SEAL. this isnt the first time ive partaken in beastiality. in fact i actually run a bestiality prostitution ring its somewhat of a gourmet operation but it rings in the big cocks. yesterday we ordered jimmy johns for a corporate outing, so i fed all the spare mayo to the cats. during, i shoved the sandwiches up my sphincter. it felt good to me so i told my coworker, babs, to do it. she didnt exist. this whole story has been a lie. boom just broke the fourth wall and i dont even give half of a shit. anywhooo as these sandy wiches were shoved up my sandy wich i realized the monster i had become so i ran to the nearest costco and bought as many lean cuisines as i possibly could. i damn near came when i ate ALL THE LEAN CUISINES IN ONE NIGHT. THE NEXT DAY I GOT SOME MORE LEAN CUISINES. GUILT CANT FUCKING STOP ME AND NEITHER CAN GUILT AND NEITHER CAN THE LAWS OF PHYSICS. I just told my friend's dog who is a dog that she has a nice ass. It is so round and luscious and I really liked it when she ayte the poopy from the bungholf. Anyways, meanwhile, however I once was the warden of a municipal water supply except it was a pisson I mean prison. Not really it was a water treatment center. I would start of each day by shitting in the toilet after I woke up but i wouldn't warsh my hands because I'm a dirty boy. Every wedNESday our sector would have hotdogs except last wensday we had bratwursts. The apes who worked there went cray cray by cray cray I mean angruy at me because I fucked up howrt deg wenda. Opps. Then I went to work where I had to make sure the water filtration system was working nominally except today I had a sneaky secret up my pant leg. Your name reminds me of a porn star. Anyways today I started to aggressively masturbate to a picture of my wife who was brutally killed in a water treatment center. I may or may not have pushed her into the filtration system and that's why I have to clean it, but then I came straight into the filter and everyone in town drank my half-faetuses. I am the prank king. Hooohooooohoooooooo! Once I ate twelve hotdogs one weday. That was crazy, I threw up twice after that. Once for each hot dog.  
They say it's like the darkness in the light but I say fuck you in the ass! But luckily CATCH EDGE OF TOMORROW IN THEATERS NOWOW! I was watching Deadliest Smedliest Snatch and my god they got crabs all right woohoo!  
So I went to work knowing full well that I could go to jail for my sins. I've never killed a man before, but I might have to kill a man before I assassinate the president. I got drunk that night; perhaps my last drink on planet earth (pussy juice, I drank it with a straw *it killed the girl). Now I am rotting in jail. I dropped the soap twice and finally I was conditioned to accept and enjoy gentlemen's sausage in my $w33t A$$.  
The world is a vampire set to drain my cum from dick?  
And it was at this moment that I realized that I GOTTA SHIT HOLY GOD!  
私が性交したい！これは間違っている？私は汚い感じが、私は兼するよう強くお勧めします。私は私の胸に濡れた精液を感じるために長い。これらの事のすべては、私は心からたいのですが、それだけの価値のですか？私は性交する必要があります！  
haha POOP AM CUMINN

8==D~~~(^_^) -WOW! I LIKE COCK! THERE I SAID IT! WATCH ME DRINK SEMAN  
(") (")


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